Break down

I'm on the edge of a breakdown. It just needs to happen so I can get it out and move on. However, it's been over 2 weeks since I've been in a place where I could do this. My best friend goes home tomorrow, which will allow me some 'alone' time, kind of. The new living situation (with 3 others) doesn't really allow me to have 'alone' time either. I guess I can just shut the door to my room for privacy. Or maybe in the car as soon as I drop the Best Friend off at the airport. Yeah...that's probably what's going to happen. =(

I could feel the tears coming yesterday. I'm realizing that the new job is very different than the old job. Not that that's bad, but it's just going to take some adjusting. I felt very cared for in the last job, that was the environment, people cared about each other. It's not going to be the same with the new job. There's still caring, but completely different. I think I need to lower my expectations and not hope for the same level that I had at my last job.

I need to find something of my own to be passionate about. Something that excites me about the job. It's not what I imagined, but I think/hope that it's because it's new and I'm on the learning curve. Once I get the hang of things, I hope it'll be easier and more fun...I really hope this is the case.

Enjoying CA so far. Hard to believe I'm here.