3 weeks later

I can't believe that it's already been 3 weeks since my last post. The good news is that I've seen the new guy twice since the last post and things are going very well. But you know me, I wonder if they're going *too* well.

The same week of my last post, I bought a ticket to visit him. Why so soon? Partially because I didn't want to stay with him and needed to coordinate with a girl friend locally who I knew I could trust with the secret of why I was coming to town. More importantly, I wanted to see him again and see how things would go with us in the same city for a weekend. I can say that it was an amazing weekend, even with him trying to cancel our first date night out because he had a really bad day. I agreed to move our date night to the following night, but then told him I wanted to bring dinner to his place and watch a movie...that I was in town to see him and totally understand that he had a bad day, but that didn't mean we couldn't see each other. Major brownie points for me as he told me multiple times that was the nicest thing a woman's ever done for him. *I rock!* He surprised me too with roses, wine, and a mini-birthday cake.

Date night the next night was also amazing...great conversation and getting to know each other, great food and wine and we ended the night poolside at a hotel bar, cuddling on a lounger and talking until the bar closed. I get nervous that the conversation will feel too forced, but with him, it's very natural...genuine...comfortable...which in turn is a little terrifying!

I got back yesterday from another amazing weekend with him. Truly amazing. But--yes, there's a but--we had some interesting conversations about distance and work schedules. He has a lot going on right now, and as much as he cares about me, is focused on other things. I'm putting on the brave face of "It's ok...I totally understand" and am being supportive, but at the same time, I feel like I'm initiating all of the effort at this time. Wait--not true--he did pay for me to come down, planned dates for us, etc. However, I'm the one who sends a text/IM each morning to say Good Morning. Yes, he responds, but I feel like I'm the needy one because I'm not getting the attention I want.

Bottom line--I'm psyching myself out about this and can't do that. He is AMAZING and worships me. ;) As I do him. I'm very attracted to him and love that we connect on multiple levels. We get each other and as much as I wish he showered me with attention all day long, I know that he will when he has time. He surprises me and sends me text messages every now and then, which means I know he's thinking about me.

Don't you hate how you can sabotage something before it even starts? That's it...stopping it right now!