Know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em

I love playing board games and card games and video games and trivia games, but I can't stand playing mind games. I feel like I've been doing this a lot lately and I really don't like it. It's not me. It's not how I work, but I feel like I need to do this right now.

I've been in negotiations for a contract for the new job. We've been going back and forth about this for 2 months and just a few weeks ago, what was offered to me was quite insulting and really pissed me off. I've already told my current boss that I'm leaving, I'm planning a move and want to start preparing for this new job which would start in May, but there was no way I was accepting the last, and lowest, offer. Someone asked me why I wanted to do this job. I answered that it sounds like an amazing experience, I'd be moving to a new area, which is exciting, it'd be doing something I'd enjoy, and the guy I'm working with is pretty cool. This person responded with, "That whole package could happen with any job." Wow...she's right. I hadn't thought about that.

So now I'm playing the game that I've been avoiding until a new contract is offered for the new job. Do I like doing this? No, but the alternative is to walk away, which I was ready to do before my eyes were opened to other options. Honestly, the opportunity excites me too much to just do that. I'd wonder for the rest of my life 'what would've happened if...' That's worse than playing mind games to me.

Why can't people just be honest and open about what they are thinking or feeling? I'm pretty open, especially with this job, yet don't know that it's been super beneficial. Yes, he and I have great communication, which is the only way this will ever work as he drives me nuts sometimes (I've told him this...but don't think he's ever told me how much I annoy/bother/irk him, and I'm sure I do). We've worked through some rough patches, which really makes me think that this will all work out.

Because of this last round of contracts, I don't know that I fully trust him the way I have in the past. I'm scared it's going to come time for us to get the contract finalized and me plan a move and it's not going to happen. Has he done anything to make me think he would do this? Nothing more than offering a laughable contract to me. So why is it so hard to jump back into trusting him? Why can't I let that piece go and trust him fully again? Should you ever have 100% trust in the people you work with? My head says, "Yes, why wouldn't you?" and my gut says, "that's a risky move in business." Is there a happy medium?

So when do you know when to walk away and know when to run? I just want to give up sometimes. Fighting the fight can be too draining and not rewarding, which makes giving up seem like the better option. Does that mean I give up as in quit or I give in to whatever he wants? Why is it so much harder to play the games than to just walk away?