It's been a while...

I'm dusting off the old secret blog but mostly because I need to post today thanks to NaBloPoMo and just don't have the energy to post on my public site. Thus...this post allows me to keep the commitment of posting each day.

I went to a wedding reception earlier today and had a gala event I attended last night. Both were great events, but I felt so awkward at times as I flew solo to both events. I've lost the art of small talk and conversation and it's made me increase on the 'social awkwardness' scale.

I used to be the social butterfly...the one who would kick the party off and make sure everyone was having a good time. I had invites to all of the events and went to everything I could. I also suffered from FOMO (fear of missing out) and eventually burned myself out by overdoing it. In my early 20's, I finally realized that I didn't need to be at everything.

Moving to Silicon Valley has put me back into the ecosystem of a full social calendar with multiple parties and events each night, but I just can't do it. I don't have the energy for small talk and schmoozing, which are at the top of some peoples agendas who attend every event they can. I would much rather have a dinner with 3 friends to catch up and have an opportunity to go to a deeper level, which just doesn't happen at massive social events.

When did I become such an introvert? I need to find that balance between social butterfly and selectiveness.